Missives

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Location: Rochester, Minnesota, United States

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Lord, It's Hard To Be Humble

There are events, during the course of our everyday lives, that make us take a step back and look at our lives more philosophically. Weddings, funerals, job changes, divorce, remarriage, chocolate ice cream, having to buy a larger size of underwear.

I've always known that I am quite talented. I've also always known that I haven't lived up to that potential. Don't count me out yet. Life's far from over. (I hope) But what I didn't realize until just a few years ago, is what a great person I am. Yes, I know. Whenever I publicly admit it, I must stand fast through the torrent of admonitions for my arrogance. As I tell my friends, it ain't arrogance if you can back it up. Or, maybe it is. Maybe it's not egotistical if you can back it up. That seems more likely. Anyway, I don't feel it's arrogance to make a statement of fact. Too often humans, and female humans especially, fail to understand and really believe how wonderful they really are.

And I'm not talking the Angelina Jolie save a baby from every nation or Audrey Hepburn's UNICEF Ambassador for life kind of amazing. Although I wish I could impact the world like that. But between cleaning the cat puke on the living room rug, applying cold compresses to mosquito bites by delicate body parts, doing the housework, trying (very poorly, I admit) to keep up with correspondance, living and barely managing a day to day life, where the heck am I gonna get time to save the world?

It's not that I have this abundance of 'stuff' to offer. I don't. I don't have a high powered (or even high paying) career. My career ended and I still can't figure out what I want to be when I grow up (well, actually, I have. I just don't know what to do in the meantime). I don't make a great deal of money, have an incredible benefits and/or retirement package. I can't rewire an entire Victorian or whip up quick batches of creme filled puffed pastries. I don't come complete with a large and connected family. I don't even have the kind of friends one uses for networking. And, for my own personal glory moment, I think that makes me even more awesome.

Different strokes and all that aside, I have something to offer. Not the world, but just a few people who live in it. I have me to offer. And as I get older, meet more people, and continue to blog I become more enamored of myself. Vanity! I like my spunk. (Mary Tyler Moore fans insert Mr. Grant quote here) Like I said, I can't offer money, career, dinner parties or tickets to the ballet. What I can offer is love, admiration, loyalty, acceptance, perseverence, humor and a really decent meat loaf. In short, I can offer myself.

Don't go getting cute with the "offer myself" jokes. Just don't even think of going there.

I was just thinking today of someone I admired. She passed away. I understand it's bound to happen to all of us. But that doesn't make it any easier for those left behind. She was something else. And she had a lot to offer. And offer she did. I can only hope that I live to be as appreciated and included as she was.

God Bless Us Every One.


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