Missives

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Location: Rochester, Minnesota, United States

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

Get Back

Several years ago - perhaps as many as five or six - I joined a tiny little group of Al-Anon on Block Island. There wasn't enough involvement to warrant year-round meetings (plenty of need, not plenty of interest)so it was a hard habit to get into.

I went for one reason but found other reasons to stay. I can say, with some degree of certainty, that Al-Anon might possibly have saved my life. Definitely my sanity. Or what little I had to begin with.

One of those "Bible" books that so many Al-Anon members read over and over again is a book on [psycho-babble catchphrase warning] 'co-dependency'. It fits in very well with the 12 steps.

Since moving here I have been unable to attend any meetings. I stopped reading the postings of my on-line group. I easily got into the habit of not 'working the steps'. It is not an unusual habit for many Al-Anon-ers to develop. Most long-timers went through it. It's as normal as people like us can be.

When life becomes its most scary, uncertain and fraught with pain and disappointment, that - so the teachings go - is the most important time to detach with love. Your problems will not miraculously right themselves through desperation, chaos, guilt and fear. Only when you can act from a place of peace and serenity can you truly affect positive change. Gee. How zen of me.

My cousin's house can hardly be called peaceful. Definitely not serene. But there is love and life there. Sometimes even some acceptance. Usually if you bake something. A few weeks there ought to make for some rightness.


It's time for me to get back to 'working the program' and get on with the difficulties of the uncertain, but exciting, future that lay ahead of me.


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