Don't Be Stupid

Let's just take a moment to discuss something that we've all thought about at one time or another: incompetence.

I've always felt that true incompetence is a choice. Perhaps that's implied in the original definition of the word. Sometimes the word is applied to those who are not well suited to tasks or situations when they are not actually incompetent, just....well....ill-suited. I have worked with, lived with, partied with and sometimes been that particular person. And the simple fact is that when someone tries so very hard and fails, I don't think that particularly defines incompetence.

No, true incompetence is failure from the lack of trying. Laziness is usually the bedfellow of true incompetents. Apathy is more like a friend with benefits. Cluelessness definitely flirts with a true incompetent. Arrogance usually drops by from time to time.

Incompetence bothers me. I hate - nay, detest - being incompetent at things. And there are things at which I am truly incompetent, therefore do not at all. And I think the thing that has bothered me most in the past few weeks is the regular, daily, normal life incompetence that one seems to be encountering more and more. It's rather unbelievable, isn't it, the number of people encountered who are clinging to, if not proud of, their incompetence. People who find themselves in regular financial tangles because of their 'incompetence' with balancing their checkbook, for example. Sure, it's harder for some people than it is for others. And if you are truly terrible at balancing your checkbook, feel free to find someone else in the family to help you. Perhaps your three year old. Then you're hopeless, not incompetent. I know so many people who claim so many different afflictions as excuses not to rise above their own incompetence. "I think I have ADD", "I can never figure these things out", "Martians stole a part of my brain", "These things are designed to piss people off", "I never learned how", "If I ignore it, it does not exist", "That's stupid", "I won't have to do that when I win the powerball"....the list goes on and on.

Now don't get me wrong. I am a big fan of rationalizations and deferred responsibility. But I do get tired of rubbing shoulders with incompetents. Or having my shoulders rubbed by incompetents, nothing worse than a bad backrub. Those who hide behind bullishness, ensuring their "rights" and temper tantrums bore me. I know people who actually cannot/will not use bank drive-thrus or pay rent checks themselves because they "can't figure these things out". They make others do these things for them. Usually spouses or children. There are those who can't fold laundry because they don't know the right way, or the way their significant other likes it. Or pump their own gas because they don't understand how the credit card thing works. Or make their own telephone calls because they get lost in the complicated voicemail system. The list goes on and on. Usually the daily and mundane chores that most of us dread and still manage to achieve, albeit with some difficulty. But the everyday incompetence of a molehill will someday rise to the proportions of a mountain and I hope that those I know and/or love (not necessarily both at the same time) will not be victims of this. Incompetents are people you can't trust in an emergency. They usually don't know First Aid or CPR, or if they do they never learned the proper way and can actually administer more harm than good. Incompetents' first reactions to emergency situations is usually to completely freak out and then find something inappropriate to focus on or begin to do because incompetents have never learned to deal with difficult issues.

Now, I realize this is just ranting and rambling, but I have watched incompetents for some time now. I find that dealing with them in a daily basis can be so exhausting. I feel sorry for those married to daily incompetents whose spouses have to do most things for them and who, eventually, feel so put upon they begin to wonder "Exactly what did I marry you for?" I feel sorry for the incompetent employee or co-worker for all the same reasons.

Incompetence, it's not just for breakfast anymore.